My Journey

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Feeling Like Myself. But Skinnier: Post Op 6 Days

I have been feeling great and my pain is basically gone. I can even sleep on my stomach again. Thank goodness! I ended up going to back to work again Wed and Thurs and it all went much better. It actually was nice to be so pre-occupied with working on curriculum and not so busy thinking about all the crunchy foods I miss. (oh, crunchy foods I miss you!! I even had a bit of toast yesterday, chewed it and spit it out! When can I eat toast again?)

My mom came down from NY this week to help me with the kids so I wouldn't have to break the "no lifting more than 10 lbs" policy. She took my little girl back to NY for the week and next we will go up to visit and get her. So tonight my hubby worked and it was me and Logan (all 17 lbs). I had to lift him several times throughout the night and I could feel a little pressure on my stomach. I will have to be smart and really limit how often I pick him up.

I haven't been doing too great on the liquids today. It def takes a lot of thought to drink 64oz and get 70g of protein. I've been mainly doing crystal light, water, ice pops and protein shakes. I won't be doing eggs for a very long time as made clear from the post below! I am excited to get the puree stage next week.

Ya know what I really hate?....taking all the required pills. The multi vitamin, the calcium, the acid blocker, my allergy meds. I am not of fan of having to break the pills apart. They get all jagged and hurt more when they go down.

I called my dr to get my appt set for my 1 month. I have heard that the 3rd and 4th week are pretty challenging due to not feeling much restriction, so when the lady gave me an appt for 5 weeks post op, I was thinking NO WAY! So I asked if she could look a week earlier and she magically found me an appointment exactly 4 weeks post op. I am hoping to lost 20 lbs by my first appt.

Jake has been really helpful with the kids. He is pretty much the grumpiest person in morning that ever lived so for him to get up with the kids every morning and be putting them to bed every night, he gets the Golden Daddy Award. We both are not morning people and love to stay up late, so in the summer when I have off of school we alternate who gets up in the morning. It is really gonna suck when he gets a Big Boy job (he just graduated in May) and we can't just be together all the time in the summer. I love love love being with my husband just running errands, shopping and cuddling up.

Anyway....The scale tonight was 204 lbs. I am pretty excited to see the numbers still going down. My clothes felt better. Jake hasn't gotten any action yet.(geez...give me a week to heal here!)

Thanks again to all my followers for um....well....following! As a thank you, here is a picture of my cute little boy! He is 6 months and he learned to crawl and stand a few weeks back and is quite pleased with himself.

My Mr. Man-ee

Holy Moly Crap-oly (Literally)

So I thought I would make my own "egg soup" by scrambling an egg and putting it in my magic bullet with some skim milk. Um...Worst Idea Ever!!!!!

All I have are 2 very unfortunate words.... Explosive and Diarrhea!

Thank goodness my little one is down for a nap and I am home! Can you imagine this happening while I was driving?!

Just thought I would give any newly banded a warning on this!
More to come later tonight.

SHOUT OUT TO MY NEW FOLLOWERS! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR SUPPORT! And I expect warnings on other foods that will leave me running to the bathroom!

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Maybe Working Wasn't The Best Idea: Post Op Day 4

First: About My Day Yesterday: Post Op Day 3

I was pretty excited to be on FULL LIQUIDS! Some things allowable on full liquids include protein shakes, milk, sugar-free pudding and jello, low fat creamed soups, low sugar yogurt, and oatmeal (which I haven't tried yet cause it almost seems like a typo)

I used the handy dandy app on my phone that lets me scan the bar code and will input the nutrients of that food right to my food diary. AWESOME!! I can see exactly how much calories, fat, sugar, protein... I am getting. It also has a weight tracker and exercise tracker.

I started off with the protein shake with milk and did some ice pops, yogurt and more protein shake, cream of chicken soup, jello and more protein shake throughout the day. Everything went down really well. I managed pretty well with my water. Total calories in for the day 638 and 75g protein.

I went to target with Jake and the kiddies....always a crazy trip. Zoey won't stay in the cart for longer than 2 minutes so it is us running after her as she runs free through the store with pure delight laughing and wavy her arms all about! She is very strong willed so it is tough to coax her to go down to aisle you want. If you pick her up she will give you a good temper tantrum right there. So checkout is always......interesting.  It was good to get out though and to be moving.

Now For Today

I am a teacher so I don't work in the summer but there are sometimes a few opportunities to make some extra money working on curriculum development. I signed up to do that not knowing how I would feel today. Since we really need the money I decided I would go today and see how it went. It was a lot harder than I thought it would be. I didn't take any pain meds cause they have narcotics and I had to drive, so I tried to just deal. After sitting for a while my incision really hurt and I could tell I was getting pretty dehydrated. By 11:30am I left since I had to get to the baby's dr appt. Got home, drank a protein shake, took some pains meds since my hubby was gonna drive, made a cupcake delivery, got to the dr. I was totally loopy by this point and really had to focus through the baby's check up. Thank goodness Jake was with me!

Anyway. I probably wouldn't advise working so early after the surgery. I just needed to keep pressure off my cut and focus on my eating and staying hydrating and I just couldn't do any of that. I am gonna try working Wed and Thurs for at least a few hours.  I am feeling really good after a good nap and water and some soup. I even got into a cleaning itch in the evening and cleaned some parts of my house that really needed some TLC. I think my husband was turned on just to see it clean! lol.

Oh and the scale was 207 today! Yippeee! It might just be me, but my shirt feels a little looser. (my maternity shirt that is) :o(

Now I am off to doing some research for a big cupcake order for July. I know....isn't it terrible that I make cupcakes and am on this diet?! They are my passion though and they make me some good money!

Monday, June 27, 2011

Strange Things, Good Things, Bad Things

Yesterday was my last day on clear liquids. I took a turn for the better yesterday. I had a lot of energy. I made breakfast for Jake and Zoey. I was on my feet a lot and even felt good enough to go on a walk as a family in the evening. Jake pulled the cute little wagon my Aunt Julie got us and I was "pulled" by the dog. We only walked about 1/2 mile. I was still a little dizzy from the pain killers I had taken earlier, but managed the walk just fine.

The pain in my stomach has gotten so much better. Still very sore and I need to take it easy, but I feel like I can help with the kids (not lifting them of course), and I can sit up and even lay on my side ok.

So last night the strangest thing happened. I had been reading in people's blogs about all the gas people have been having and I haven't had really any gas. While me and Jake were in bed playing each other in WORDFEUD through our phones (I won....but soo close honey!) my stomach just started rumbling. I could feel the gas traveling through my system. It was the weirdest feeling. It then led to a lot of watery diarrhea (sorry TMI) which I seemed to have all night, but this morning I could def tell I wasn't as bloated in my stomach. It is like my stomach just....deflated. In fact, the scale says 209. I'll take that!

Target Whey Protein Isolate only $17.99
Well.... today is my 1st day on FULL LIQUIDS. The baby woke up at 6:30. My hubby has a hissy fit anytime the baby wakes up earlier than 7am. He pouts around pretending to be angry with the cutest baby in the world. We both know it's not possible!  We both got up cause I thought I should get a head start on getting some protein. I got the target brand whey protein. I used my kitchen aid blender thingey to mix it with some milk. It was actually really good and made it really thick and frothy. I only had about 4 oz.  So far it is sitting ok in my stomach. I am gonna try some yogurt today and maybe tomorrow some soup. Getting 64 oz of water and 70g of protein might be tough. 

Oh and I want to shout out to my one commenter! Thanks!! It's nice to know I'm not alone in cyberspace!

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Do I Really Look Like This?

This is really hard for me to post and face the fact that I actually look like this! Man. It makes so much sense though at how uncomfortable I am in my body. I used to be....well pretty. While I was never skinny skinny, I was pretty. My students had crushes on me. They had competitions to see who could get me to hug them. (It never happened!) I had cute clothes and wore heels EVERYDAY!  

I have always had a lot of confidence in myself, but lately I don't even want to leave the house. I don't want to find one of the three outfits that fit me. I don't want to be seen like this. I don't want my kids to remember me like this. 

I feel so blessed to have had this surgery. My BMI was so borderline (my dr. referred to me as thin compared to others trying to that I thought insurance wouldn't cover it, and at first they said no, but my dr. made a call and got the surgery approved. The day I got weighed at the office my weight was 216. It had never been that high before. It was only 216 for 3 hours and then was back to 212 and has never been that high again. I can't help but feel that God was putting his hand in this to help me be the right weight to get approved.

So this is me.... 5'1" and 212 lbs....BMI 40.1

Well, time for some chicken noodle soup (well, just the broth from the homemade soup I made today).

Banded! 24 hrs After Surgery

So, it's done! No turning back now.

I got to the hospital about 8:30am. They got me in my hospital gown, weighed me, got my IV started and I just chilled for several hours. As a mommy of two under two, several hours to just sit and do nothing might as well be a trip to the Bahamas. lol.

About 11:30am things got rolling and I walked into the OR. I have watched a lot of Grey's Anatomy, so it was kind of exciting to be back in an OR with the bright lights and very sterile feel of the room. I laid down and and before you know it I was out!

I woke up about 2. It was so hard to stay awake. The pain wasn't too bad but got worse the more lucid I became. They put pain meds through my IV and it was heaven. It kind of felt like the epidural I got with my babies...just numb all over.

The dr. was awesome and only made 1 incision in my belly button. You can't even see it. This will be really nice for if I ever make it into a sexy bathing suit one day!

Since Jake was with the kids, he got there around 3pm and helped me get my liquid percocet filled and I was released from the hospital by 4:30pm.

I got home and basically passed out. I tried to drink what I could, but I just wanted to sleep. It really hurt to walk, talk and move in general. It was pretty hard to listen to my husband struggle with bedtime routine. I wish I could have helped but there was really nothing I could have done. I know how hard that time of the night gets and it sucks to do in on your own.

Today I am feeling better. There is still a lot of pain and the percocet makes me sleepy but I am feeling more awake and am functioning better. I was cutting up chicken and veggies to make soup for the fam. It was good to contribute SOMETHING to the day! I hope I can help a bit with bedtime.

My weigh in at the hospital was 212. This morning I was weird? I am gonna give it a few days before I hit the scale again when I am feeling better.  I will post pictures later when I can figure out where the cord for my camera is!

Still feeling really excited about all this! Looking forward to getting in the full liquid when I can have pudding, or yogurt or soup!

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Night Before Surgery! Already a Failure!

I ate a huge lunch! Totally enjoyed a taco salad with lettuce, tomatoes, lettuce, chicken, rice, black beans and cheese.Oh....and don't forget the essence of a taco salad, the taco shell! Tonight I'm reading through my notes for the surgery and read CLEAR LIQUIDS for 24 hr prior to surgery. DANG IT!!! How did I mess this up already?! So much info was being thrown at me at that informational session. It was only a matter of time.

Well I didn't have dinner so I guess that is good. I am pretty used to a crazy night filled with bath time and getting diapers on and pj's on and stories read and bottles fed and everyone off to bed. Hubby works at night so it is like my own little marathon. I am usually sweating by end of it and often times don't get dinner at all or late. (This will have to change after surgery, but then again I can make a protein shake in 1 min.....simple. I'm excited for more simple in my life)  But back to me screwing it up....

I hope this doesn't effect my surgery. I might cry if they make me re-schedule! 

I am feeling a little unprepared about the surgery tomorrow. We don't have our family here so we are going to have friends watch the kids for a few hours so Jake can pick me up and get me settled, but I have no time line to give them and that is not my thing! I am ok with Jake*** not being in the room with me before I go and after I wake up. I feel good knowing he will be with them. He won't be missing a party in my hospital room or anything.

Jake will be on his own to handle the kids for a few days while I recover. I know he is fully capable of it. I don't know if I am fully capable of not being able to hold my babies for a few weeks. 

Tomorrow I will do my official weigh in and take a few pictures. I smudged all my mascara off from rubbing my eyes so much cause of allergies and I'm not looking so hot. I have been avoiding pictures for months, so it will be strange to start taking a bunch!  I am sure many of you can relate. 

Well... more tomorrow after surgery I am officially on my ROAD TO REALIZE! (I'm clever right?!) 

*** Side note: Jake doesn't ask much about the surgery. I usually do enough talking for him to get the whole picture, but today he did ask one very important question....."When will I be able to have sex again after the surgery?" Ahhhh. Gotta love guys!

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Hi! and Goodbye! About Me

Hi Blogging World! Goodbye Fat Jeans! Ok...So I don't even have fat jeans. Actually my fat jeans are ripping at the thighs so I can't wear them anymore, so my maternity jeans are my new fat jeans.

Ok. Let me be honest. My fat maternity jeans have never seen a day of pregnancy. I bought them POST baby #2 cause I didn't want to have to face what size I might really be. I guess I will never know and somehow I think I will get through the night!

It is LATE LATE Wednesday night. I have been reading and watching all these gastric banding weight loss journeys online and felt true real-ness from these people. More than anything with this surgery, I want to be REAL about it. I want to feel accountable for my decisions. I want to feel that I have people who have done this or are doing it or want to do it right there beside me. By having a blog, I will feel like I need to answer to it.  My husband would be too nice to actually jump up and intercept a cupcake from me mid-air before I ruin my next weigh in, but this blog might help to motivate me to never pick it up in the 1st place!

About me..... I am 27 wife, mommy and teacher! I was overweight most of my life. Even as a kid I was, even though I danced 6-8 hours a week and danced competitively most of my school career. It wasn't rinkey doo dance either. I REALLY danced and danced well. You don't usually see the chubby girl front and center often, but there I was in almost every type of dance. The stage was my playground!

In high school, my weight yo-yo'd. Junior year I put on a lot of weight ( I stopped dancing that year). Senior year me and Billy Banks on VHS did a lot of kick boxing in my room and I lost a bit.

College my high school boyfriend dumped me suddenly, and it motivated me to become the best me I could be. I worked out 6 days a week taking kick boxing, starting my own dance team at the University, teaching hip hop and lyrical classes, running and eating 1100 calories. I only lost 25 pounds, but I felt great and looked great too.

My last year in college I met my hubby and we got married. Being with him is so easy and wonderful! It was easy to gain weight as newly weds. After my 1st year teaching Home Ec, I became the cheer coach. It left me with no time for the gym.Gained 20 lbs. Then I got pregnant with my 1st, gained 25 pounds and only lost 10. When Zoey was 6 months, I got the surprise of a lifetime that I was pregnant again! Gained 15 lbs. Logan was born 14 months apart from Zoey. In the midst of all that I started a small cupcake business....not the best for the diet, but it really helps pay the bills!

All in has always been super hard for me to lose weight without intense diet and exercise and so easy to gain weight in every setting! I am, 2 days from getting the Realize Band! I weigh 212 lbs, putting my BMI at 40.1. My surgery is for June 24th at 10:30am. I am hoping to do mostly all liquid tomorrow in preparing for surgery and would love to go in with a BMI below 40.

I am feeling all the feelings most would have. I am excited to see the pounds coming off and to work hard to  achieve the best possible results! I am nervous about having surgery and how I will feel afterwards. I am worried that my busy schedule will make it hard to focus on my nutrition and exercise. I am worried that I won't have time to exercise.

My goals overall is to fit into size 8 jeans or be 125 pounds. I will def be making smaller goals as I go and updating here on the blog at least once a week with pictures and stories.

Tomorrow I will try to post a PRE-OPT picture! But seriously....I'm exhausted and I know my little ones don't know what sleeping in is! It is summer break for me and since my hubby has been a  Stay At Home Dad this past year I am gonna get up with the kids in the morning so he can sleep in! (side note: My hubby just graduated and is on the search for a big boy job. He is the Best hubby and daddy in the world!!)

Me and Hubby Engaged!
Night World Wide Web!