My Journey

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Do I Really Look Like This?

This is really hard for me to post and face the fact that I actually look like this! Man. It makes so much sense though at how uncomfortable I am in my body. I used to be....well pretty. While I was never skinny skinny, I was pretty. My students had crushes on me. They had competitions to see who could get me to hug them. (It never happened!) I had cute clothes and wore heels EVERYDAY!  

I have always had a lot of confidence in myself, but lately I don't even want to leave the house. I don't want to find one of the three outfits that fit me. I don't want to be seen like this. I don't want my kids to remember me like this. 

I feel so blessed to have had this surgery. My BMI was so borderline (my dr. referred to me as thin compared to others trying to that I thought insurance wouldn't cover it, and at first they said no, but my dr. made a call and got the surgery approved. The day I got weighed at the office my weight was 216. It had never been that high before. It was only 216 for 3 hours and then was back to 212 and has never been that high again. I can't help but feel that God was putting his hand in this to help me be the right weight to get approved.

So this is me.... 5'1" and 212 lbs....BMI 40.1

Well, time for some chicken noodle soup (well, just the broth from the homemade soup I made today).

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